Who said anything about tongues?

You've screwed the pooch on that one.

I don't trust it as far as I can throw it.

Don't speak to me until I've had my donut.

Now, back to Britney

I just want to know who FattyFatty2x4 is.

I just got slammed in the ear.

I'm just going to stop speaking....

It's more I have green juice running out of my eyes...

It's very juicy...I hope I didn't kill it.

Don’t ever fib to me in a ticket again. I’ll come down and break your legs.

Sad panda =(

Their firewall is tighter than some dams I've seen.

I love it when guys throw credit cards at me.

You sent him an email? That's like setting the cheese next to the mousetrap instead of on it.

I want this off my plate and out of my face!!

You're letting your high expectations show. You might want to tuck that in.

Get away from my computer...

I'm a little teapot, short and stout... BITCH.

Poor Decisions

I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.

Your Blackberry

Mmm Hmmmm...
(Not typically used to express agreement, but rather used as a passing greeting in combination with a suspicious look)

Did I say something blogworthy today?

Did I say something blog-worthy today?

I'm sorry I accused you of changing my wallpaper to a Ford product.

I can't help it you run / use / own an inferior [insert anything Dave owns].

I HATE YOU ALL!

Sometimes when we touch the honesty's too much

Sad face.

Your a walking clouch

I don't have time for this, i have like 22 things on my plate

You're a good person, no matter what [insert name of nearest person] says.

10-4.